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艾倫.狄珍妮為2009年杜蘭大學畢業生演講

Ellen DeGeneres at Tulane's 2009 Commencement Speech

 

Photo of three lions hunting on the Serengeti.

講者:艾倫.狄珍妮

2009年5月16日演講

 

翻譯:洪曉慧

編輯:朱學恆

簡繁轉換:洪曉慧

後製:洪曉慧

字幕影片後制:謝旻均

 

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關於這場演講(來源World News.com

出身於紐奧良、廣受歡迎的電視節目主持人艾倫.狄珍妮擔任2009年杜蘭大學畢業典禮演講者。本屆畢業生是於2005年秋季入學的「卡崔娜颶風班」。

 

關於艾倫.狄珍妮(來源biography.com

1958年1月26日出生於路易斯安那州Metairie的艾倫.狄珍妮,在主演情境喜劇《Ellen》之前,已是一位成功的單人脫口秀表演者。1997年,她公開自己的同志性向,成為不遺餘力的同志權益倡導者。從2003年至今,她主持獲獎多次的脫口秀節目《艾倫.狄珍妮秀》,並於2004年與女友Portia de Rossi結婚。

 

艾倫.狄珍妮為2009年杜蘭大學畢業生演講

 

謝謝Cowan校長、Cowan校長夫人;顯赫的來賓、平庸的來賓-各位心裡有數;令人尊敬的師長和令人毛骨悚然的西班牙語老師。因此-(笑聲)感謝所有2009年畢業生。

 

我知道你們大多宿醉未醒、頭痛欲裂,自從油膩星期二(Fat Tuesday,紐奧良著名慶典)之後還沒睡過,但你們得等我講完才能畢業,所以聽著吧!(歡呼聲)(掌聲)

 

當我獲邀擔任畢業演講者時,我二話不說地答應了,然後開始查閱畢業典禮是什麼意思(笑聲)。如果有本字典,這應該不是難事,但我家大部分書籍都是Portia(艾倫的妻子)的,全都由澳洲文寫成(笑聲),因此我不得不自行拆解這個字眼,弄清它的含意。

 

畢業典禮(Commencement):常見的(common)水泥(cement)(笑聲),常見的水泥(common cement)。你經常在人行道上看見水泥,人行道佈滿裂縫,如果踩到裂縫,就會摔斷老媽的背(美國舊時迷信)(笑聲),大概是這個意思。(笑聲)

 

但很榮幸獲邀參加你們「常見的水泥」演講(笑聲)。我以為必須是著名校友(艾倫刻意假裝念不出校友這個字),必須畢業於這所學校才能獲得邀請。我並非貴校校友,不知Cowan校長是否知道,我根本沒唸過大學,任何大學。我並不是說你們浪費時間或金錢,但看看我,我可是大名人。(笑聲)(掌聲)

 

但我確實畢業於社會大學,我們的幸運物是胸部(笑聲)。我從小在這裡長大,我母親在Newcomb工作,每當我想從她錢包裡偷東西時,就會到那裡去。但我今天為什麼來這裡?顯然不是來偷東西;你們離我太遠,即使得手,我也逃不掉。我是為了你們來到這裡,因為我想不出比你們更頑強、更有勇氣的畢業班。我的意思是,看看各位,喔,全都穿著長袍。通常上午十點還穿著長袍,意味著你們已經墮落了。(笑聲)

 

我來這裡是因為我愛紐奧良。我在這裡出生及成長,在這裡度過人格發展期,就像你們一樣,住在這裡的期間我只洗過六次衣服。(笑聲)

 

從學校畢業後,我完全無所適從-所謂的學校是指國中-但我還是繼續完成高中學業,而我-我實在沒什麼雄心壯志,我不知道自己想做什麼。我什麼都做-我剝過牡蠣、當過帶位員、當過酒保、當過服務生、做過油漆工、賣過吸塵器,我完全不知道自己想做什麼。我想,只要找份固定工作,賺取足夠的錢付房租,也許能裝個最基本的有線電視,也許不能;我根本毫無計畫。

 

我想說的重點是,當我在你們這個年紀時,真的以為我瞭解自己,但我根本一無所知。舉例來說,當我在你們這個年紀時,曾經和男生約會(艾倫是著名的出櫃女同志)(笑聲)。因此我的意思是,當你們年紀漸長,大多數人都會變成同志(笑聲)(掌聲)。有人記下這句金玉良言嗎?各位家長?(笑聲)

 

總之,我對自己的人生毫無頭緒,一場悲劇的發生導致我走上現在這條路。當時我大約十九歲,我當時的女友在一場車禍中喪生。我經過事故現場,我不知道出事的是她,於是繼續前進,不久後才發現是她。當時我住在一間公寓的地下室,沒有錢、沒有暖氣、沒有空調、地板上放了張床墊、屋裡滿是跳蚤。我不斷地思索,為何她突然消失,跳蚤卻依然存在?我無法理解。其中必定有某種含意,如果能打電話給上帝,不是簡單多了?問問祂這些問題。

 

我開始寫作,腦海中泉湧而出的是與上帝的假想對話,我單方面的獨白。寫完之後,我看著手稿,對自己說-當時我不曾嘗試過脫口秀,鎮上也沒有夜總會-我說,「我要在強尼‧卡森的《今夜秀》上表演這段獨白。」他是當時的脫口秀天王。「我要成為這個節目第一位獲邀受訪的女性來賓。」幾年後,我成了這個節目有史以來第一位女性來賓,唯一獲邀受訪的女性來賓,全因為我撰寫的那段與上帝的對話。

 

我從此展開脫口秀生涯,十分成功、大受歡迎,但也歷經艱辛。因為我試著取悅每個人,但同時保有一個秘密:我是同志。我認為如果人們發現這個秘密,將不會再喜歡我,不會再因為我的演出開懷大笑。之後我的事業轉型成-我開始演出情境喜劇,依然十分成功,另一個層面的成功。我想,如果觀眾發現我是同志,將不會再欣賞我的演出。

 

那是很久以前的事,你或許-當時我們只有白人總統,但總之-(笑聲)(掌聲)那是多年前的往事,我終於決定-我生活在太多羞恥和恐懼中,我再也無法忍受這種生活-我決定以充滿創意的方式出櫃,和我飾演的角色同時出櫃。

 

這並非什麼政治宣言,不過是卸下肩上的重擔,我只想做真正的自己。我想,「最糟的情況是什麼?或許我會因此失業。」確實如此,我的事業毀於一旦。我主演六年的劇集在毫無預警的情況下停播,我從報上得知這個消息;三年內不曾有任何電話邀約,沒人提供我工作機會、沒人願意和我有所牽扯。但…我收到本來想自殺的年輕人來信,因為我的出櫃而打消念頭。我意識到自己的存在具有某種意義,不僅是關於我、關於名聲,但-我感到彷彿受到懲罰…那是一段難熬的日子,我感到憤怒、悲傷,然後我得到脫口秀演出機會。提供我演出機會的人試著出售這個節目,大多數電視臺都不願播出,大多數人都不願購買,因為他們認為沒人想看我的節目。

 

說真的,當回首過往,我不想改變任何事。我的意思是,對我來說,失去一切是個關鍵,因為這讓我明白,最重要的是忠於自我,這正是成就今日的我的動力。

 

我不再生活於恐懼中,我獲得自由,不再有秘密。我知道自己總會否極泰來,因為無論如何,我知道自己是誰。

 

因此,總而言之,年輕時,我對成功的看法和現在大不相同,我想-長大後我要出名;我要當明星、拍電影;我想環遊世界、開名車;我想擁有粉絲(groupies)-引用小野貓合唱團的歌詞-順帶一提,多少人聽成胸部(boobies)?不,我說的是粉絲(groupies)。

 

但現在我對成功的看法已大不相同。隨著年齡增長,你將發現成功的定義隨之改變。對在座大多數人來說,目前成功的定義就是能灌下20杯龍舌蘭(笑聲);對我來說,生命中最重要的是擁有表裡如一的人生。別屈服於旁人壓力,試圖成為不符合你本性的人;以誠實、富有同理心的態度經營人生;在某方面做出貢獻。

 

因此,總結一下我的結論:追隨你的熱情、忠於自我;別追隨他人的腳步,除非你在樹林裡迷路,眼前只有一條路,非走不可(笑聲);別提供他人建議,這將使你身受其害;別聽從任何人的建議;因此我給你們的建議是:忠於自我,一切都會否極泰來。

 

我知道在座許多人擔心自己的未來,但沒必要擔心。經濟蓬勃發展、就業市場前景看好、地球環境還算不錯,一切都棒極了。你們已在颶風中逃過一劫,還有什麼好怕的?正如我之前提過的,某些最糟的經歷將帶給你最深的領悟,現在你們知道第一次面試時該問什麼了。例如:「工作地點位於海平面上嗎?」(笑聲)

 

因此,總結一下我之前於「常見的水泥」演講中所做的結論。我想我試圖表達的是,人生如同一場大型嘉年華,但別展示你的胸部,展示你的頭腦。如果人們欣賞眼中所見,你將得到多到爆的珠鍊,大多時候都能喝得醉醺醺的。

 

因此,2009年卡崔娜颶風畢業班,恭喜各位。如果你記不得我今天的演講,請記住這句話:你將安然度過一切。

 

噹-噠-嘟-嘟-嘟,跳舞吧!(歡呼聲)(掌聲)

 

以下為系統擷取之英文原文

About this talk

Top-rated television show host and New Orleans native Ellen DeGeneres was the keynote speaker at Tulane University's 2009 Commencement. This was the graduation of the "Katrina Class" that entered in Fall 2005.
 
 
About Ellen DeGeneres
Born on January 26, 1958, in Metairie, Louisiana, Ellen DeGeneres became big as a stand-up comedian before starring on her own sitcom, Ellen. In 1997, she came out as gay and has become a staunch advocate of LGBT rights. She has been the host of her own award-winning talk show, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, since 2003, and married girlfriend Portia de Rossi in 2004.
 
 
About the transcript
Thank you, President Cowan, Mrs. President Cowen; distinguished guests, undistinguished guests - you know who you are, honored faculty and creepy Spanish teacher. And thank you to all the graduating class of 2009, I realize most of you are hungover and have splitting headaches and haven't slept since Fat Tuesday, but you can't graduate 'til I finish, so listen up.
 
When I was asked to make the commencement speech, I immediately said yes. Then I went to look up what commencement meant. Which would have been easy if I had a dictionary, but most of the books in our house are Portia's, and they're all written in Australian. So I had to break the word down myself, to find out the meaning.
 
Commencement: common, and cement. Common cement. You commonly see cement on sidewalks. Sidewalks have cracks, and if you step on a crack, you break your mother's back. So there's that. But I'm honored that you've asked me here to speak at your common cement.
 
I thought that you had to be a famous alumnus - alumini - aluminum - alumis - you had to graduate from this school. And I didn't go to college here, and I don't know if President Cowan knows, I didn't go to any college at all. Any college. And I'm not saying you wasted your time, or money, but look at me, I"m a huge celebrity.
 
Although I did graduate from the school of hard knocks, our mascot was the knockers. I spent a lot of time here growing up. My mom worked at (?) and I would go there every time I needed to steal something out of her purse. But why am I here today? Clearly not to steal, you're too far away and I'd never get away with it.
 
I'm here because of you. Because I can't think of a more tenacious, more courageous graduating class. I mean, look at you all, wearing your robes. Usually when you're wearing a robe at 10 in the morning, it means you've given up. I'm here because I love New Orleans. I was born and raised here, I spent my formative years here, and like you, while I was living here I only did laundry six times. When I finished school, I was completely lost. And by school, I mean middle school, but I went ahead and finished high school anyway. And I - I really, I had no ambition, I didn't know what I wanted to do. I did everything from - I shucked oysters, I was a hostess, I was a bartender, I was a waitress, I painted houses, I sold vaccuum cleaners, I had no idea. And I thought I'd just finally settle in some job, and I would make enough money to pay my rent, maybe have basic cable, maybe not, I didn't really have a plan, my point is that, by the time I was your age, I really thought I knew who I was, but I had no idea. Like for example, when I was your age, I was dating men. So what I'm saying is, when you're older, most of you will be gay. Anyone writing this stuff down? Parents?
 
Anyway, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and the way I ended up on this path was from a very tragic event. I was maybe 19, and my girlfriend at the time was killed in a car accident. And I passed the accident, and I didn't know it was her and I kept going, and I found out shortly after that, it was her. And I was living in a basement apartment, I had no money, I had no heat, no air, I had a mattress on the floor and the apartment was infested with fleas. And I was soul-searching, I was like, why is she suddenly gone, and there are fleas here? I don't understand, there must be a purpose, and wouldn't it be so convenient if we could pick up the phone and call God, and ask these questions.
 
And I started writing and what poured out of me was an imaginary conversation with God, which was one-sided, and I finished writing it and I looked at it and I said to myself, and I hadn't even been doing stand-up, ever, there was no club in town. I said, "I'm gonna do this on the Tonight Show With Johnny Carson"- at the time he was the king - "and I'm gonna be the first woman in the history of the show to be called over to sit down." And several years later, I was the first woman in the history of the show, and only woman in the history of the show to sit down, because of that phone conversation with God that I wrote. And I started this path of stand-up and it was successful and it was great, but it was hard, because I was trying to please everybody and I had this secret that I was keeping, that I was gay. And I thought if people found out they wouldn't like me, they wouldn't laugh at me.
 
Then my career turned into - I got my own sitcom, and that was very successful, another level of success. And I thought, what if they find out I'm gay, then they'll never watch, and this was a long time ago, this was when we just had white presidents - this was back, many years ago - and I finally decided that I was living with so much shame, and so much fear, that I just couldn't live that way anymore, and I decided to come out and make it creative. And my character would come out at the same time, and it wasn't to make a political statement, it wasn't to do anything other than to free

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